All I Really Want - UPDATED!

Knowing that we'll be in the US soon makes enduring the food here easier. Even though Jeremy is an excellent chef, there are times when I have simply had my fill of Chinese food and need something that is comfort food by MY standards.

So now, I got to thinking about all the things I can't wait to sink my teeth into when we get there. Here's my ultimate wish list. I'd tell my Mom to take note but I can pretty much bet she's thought of everything on here. None of this will surprise her in the slightest. I can see her saying, "Well, DUH, Jennifer!" Thanks, Mom! I love you!

Jennifer's American Foodie Dreams:

Key lime pie. A whole one. Not so I can eat the whole thing but so my husband can see what he's been missing his whole life.
Conch fritters.
Stone crabs.
Crab cakes.
Chocolate chip pancakes from IHOP. With whipped cream and strawberry syrup on top. And a side of hashbrowns.
Mozzarella sticks.
A roast beef sandwich.
Corned beef on rye.
A reuben.
All kinds of deli meats piled high on rye. Or challah. Or both. With cheese. And good mustard. 
An everything bagel, toasted, with chive cream cheese, chopped onions, capers and smoked salmon.
Home fries.
Biscuits and gravy.
A cheese platter with all kinds of cheeses on it (especially brie and Gorgonzola).
Gorgonzola burgers.
Guacamole. Guacamole. GUACAMOLE!!!!
Nachos from Moe's with extra guacamole.
Burritos from Chipotle with, you guessed it, extra guacamole.
Carrot cake.
Tuna salad from Stuart Fine Foods (or whatever they call it now...oh God...it's STILL there I hope, yes?).
An Italian Special sub from LaSpada's if we go down to Ft. Lauderdale. If not, Publix Boars Head version please.
Pizza from the little place down the street from my folks'.
A Mexican fiesta, or at the very least, a meal at the awesome Mexican place by my parents' house.
EVERYTHING my mom cooks, especially her Boursin chicken and prime rib roast. Oooh! And her chicken noodle soup. Oooh! Oooh! And her lasagna! And brisket! And meatloaf! *drool*
Barbecue. Burgers, steaks, chicken...the works. American-style.
Bloody Mary's.
Mojitos.
Mimosas.
Gin and tonics.
Little Debbie Swiss Cake Rolls. Oatmeal pies. The zebra cakes. Oh God. One of everything, please.
Caramellos.
Broccoli and cheese soup.
French onion soup.
Lobster bisque.
Publix subs. Especially the chicken tender sub.
Ben & Jerry's Phish Food. And Half Baked. And any of those new ones with the cores of awesomeness in them, especially if the core is caramel.
Arby's. Beef n' cheddar. Curly fries. Horsey sauce. Jamocha shake.
Hot off the line glazed donuts from Krispy Kreme.
Dunkin Donuts. Chocolate glazed and Boston cream.
Potato skins.
Buffalo wings. With bleu cheese dressing. And bacon cheese fries with a side of ranch.
Bar food...onion rings, jalapeno poppers and all that fried nonsense.
A Nathan's hot dog with sauerkraut and mustard.
Chili! With cheese on top!
Americanized Chinese food - shrimp with lobster sauce, egg foo young, mushu pork, garlic eggplant...what? I said I'm sick of Chinese food here in CHINA. Americanized Chinese food is totally different. I need it. Especially shrimp with lobster sauce.
Bratwurst.
Italian sausages.
Baked stuffed artichokes. Oh artichokes, how I love thee!
Philly cheese steak.
Gyro. With extra tzatziki sauce.
Miami Subs. It's still around, right?
Cheese ravioli. And tortellini. Lobster ones wouldn't suck either.
And speaking of lobster...
Oh yeah. Boiled. With a side of drawn butter.
Oysters on the half shell.
Cannollis. 
Fish without bones. I'm so sick of spitting bones out with every bite over here. Gah!
Shrimp cocktail. I miss cocktail sauce!!!! I'd lick it off my own arm if I had it right now.
Cupcakes.
Those soft sugar cookies with the frosting on them. From Publix.
Pizza rolls and bagel bites!
Boston Market! OMG! Creamed spinach. Mashed potatoes with gravy.
Homemade mac n' cheese. NO BOXES!
Bacon! Bacon! Bacon!
BLT! BLT! BLT!
Buttery popcorn. Doritos. Cheetos.

UPDATE!
Some of my friends were quick to point out some very wonderful items that I'd stupidly neglected to put on this list. It's not like I haven't thought of them or told Jeremy tales of them but rather, as I was writing this list, I just forgot to put it on there. My apologies Cuban cuisine, because you I do so deeply miss. Black beans and rice. Cuban sandwiches. Cafe con leche. Guava and cheese pastries. Fried plantains. EVERYTHING. OMG. No, I did not forget you in my heart. Just on my list. 

Unlike Hall and Oates, I could go for that. Totally. ALL of that. There's probably more stuff too that I'm forgetting. If you'd been away from your home country for a long time, what would you want to eat? Is there anything in the US that you think I've been missing? Tell me in the comments, either here, on my FB fan page or tweet at me.

Look out, America! Here we come!