Merchandising Fail

I hope you like quickies because that's what you're getting tonight. I just took the first shower I've taken in a week where Seoul has NOT woken while I've been mid-shampoo and I am in bliss. Last night, she barfed on me and seemed to have a gassy, unhappy tummy for the duration of the night which meant this mommy slept maybe 2 or 3 hours.

Despite this giant sleep deficit, I was ready to go out shopping with my husband and children, braving the subzero temperatures as we went to a discount Korean shopping mall. It made us feel like we were right back in Seoul, and that makes us both quite happy. We shopped and had a really cheap and extremely delicious lunch.

We needed to go to the supermarket after this so we made our way back to the car. And that, my dears, is when we discovered this epic fail in merchandising.

What's merchandising, you ask? Well, if you've ever worked in retail, as I did after school and between semesters in college, you occasionally had to dress up the windows. Creating a flattering ensemble that makes customers want to come in and buy it is the hallmark of outstanding merchandising. This was always a manager's job but if they really liked your little part-time-after-school-special-ass, you'd get asked the best question ever (right behind "do you want a raise?" and "how would you like to go on break?" of course): "Would you like to help me with the merchandising?"

Oh hells yes! It was my favorite part of working retail. That's why this display completely baffles and amuses me. Even though it's been many years since my mall-job days, I doubt that much has changed where this would be considered a good job on dressing the windows...

Getting There Is Half The Fun

Bright and early, we blearily rose from bed somewhere around 5am on January 18th. Jeremy had spared himself the agony and finished his sleep in Raelynn's room that night. As for me, I endured a fussy baby who kept unwrapping herself from her blanket every hour on the hour. Now of course, she was sound asleep and I used it as an opportunity to ready myself.

As I washed my face and brushed my teeth, I heard our front door open and close. It was MIL. Oh God. WHY is she here? Can't she just let us alone? She had come the night before and I thought that was the end of enduring her for a few days, but no. She HAD TO come now. I try not to scowl openly but it's obvious I'm pissed. I am too tired for this shit. Never mind her, I think. I've got to get ready. So I begin covering my tired face with make-up in hopes that I won't resemble the zombie creature that I actually feel like.

And then the doorbell rings. I hate our doorbell. It is so loud and tinny and unnecessary. It's not like we live in some spacial palace. It's a small 2 bedroom apartment. You know who it is, right? FIL! Of course! But thankfully, MIL shoos him away. She shouts at him for ringing the doorbell which I find counter-productive. If we're all trying to be quiet so as not to disturb the baby while we get ready, then how is shouting at your doltish husband going to help us?

Miraculously, Seoul stays asleep through all this nonsense and doesn't wake until I am completely done shoving my make-up and the rest of our toiletries into the suitcase. Now MIL comes over, arms outstretched to hold the baby so I can eat. Again, I try not to scowl. She just wants to help, right? Sigh.

As we eat, Jeremy's busy on the phone. It seems the taxi he's reserved to take us to the airport is unable to pick us up. No problem...there's plenty of time to call for another. We get another reserved and then that guy has to cancel because his taxi won't start. Third time was the charm...another taxi was able to take us. We all went downstairs where FIL was waiting. They nag me about what I'm wearing. Why no hat? Gah. We're going to Guangzhou, not Harbin. It's MUCH warmer in Guangzhou and I have 2 kids to handle. I've worn my lighter coat on top of a thick sweatshirt. I don't want the annoyance of dragging around a massive winter coat along with our luggage as we travel.

When the taxi arrives, the woman driving it frowns. It's because of my in-laws. She thinks they are coming too and starts yipping about how we can't all fit in the taxi. Oh no, honey. Just us. Please take us away from here. And then we're off.

I think this is one of the first times we've traveled that our flight was completely on time. We flew with China Southern on the way there. As we sat in our seats, we noticed something quite odd. Something was missing. My window! I have never before seen anything like this!

You can see that the seat behind mine has a window but mine clearly does not. On the other end of the row, they had a window but the guy in the row behind that did not. Very weird!
The children were mostly good on the plane though Seoul had a fit because she was hot and tired. I tried to calm her by walking up and down the aisle but eventually had to stop because we were preparing for landing. We were sitting next to some other foreigners and I was really surprised by how kind everyone was. They kept smiling at Seoul, despite the howling cries she was emitting.

Once we arrived, we decided to take the subway to our hotel. Thankfully, no one mistook me for a chair. Jeremy had reserved us an apartment-hotel with a small kitchen so we could cook some of our meals. He said we could easily get there by taking the subway to the end of the line and then taking a taxi the short distance that remained. I was expecting much worse. It was a small room but it had 2 beds, a TV with way more cable channels than our Chinese cable company provides us (and normally, I care not about Chinese channels since we have a satellite as well but Chinese was all we were getting on this trip...and one English channel), a refrigerator, a washing machine on the balcony with drying racks for the laundry (this was incredibly useful after Seoul spit up milk on her blanket and Raelynn made a mess of some of her clothing), a microwave, a single burner cooktop and cookware. Be it ever so humble! The building itself wasn't bad either. The only problem was that each tower only had one elevator. And each tower had 32 floors. The wait time for the elevator was rather annoying.

By this point, the afternoon was wearing on and we were all very hungry. We decided to eat something first and then hit up a market for items to cook for dinner later. A small restaurant across from where we were staying was where we wound up. The food was rather plain but it hit the spot much more than the snack on the plane did.

Later, Jeremy would run out and buy us a bunch of items from a nearby market. We'd tried to go to a large supermarket that was underground in the subway entrance right by the embassy. But everything there was so expensive, we couldn't even believe it. As I passed the embassy, I teared up when I saw our flag waving in the wind. God, how I want to go home and take my husband and children with me.

Jeremy did all the cooking for the meals we ate in our room. That was because I had to handle Seoul. And Raelynn. Somehow each night, I managed to get Seoul to sleep. But because the room was small and Raelynn is noisy, I had to put her to sleep multiple times. Seoul's new favorite thing seems to be to fall into a deep sleep until I tiptoe away for a shower. As soon as I put shampoo in my hair, she's wailing.

The next morning, bright and early, Jeremy was off for his medical exam. He was 5th in line until he realized he needed to bring the email the embassy had sent to me. I had it printed out but thought he only needed it for his visa interview. So he grumpily came back for it and promptly ran back down the street to where the medical exams were administered. Around 11am, he finally returned with some amusing stories about his exam. He was surprised when they checked way up in his nose. And ears. And what caught him completely off guard was how they checked his manly junk by shaking it around. I had to laugh as he gestured wildly in the air, making noises to accompany this visual. Poor Jeremy.

He wasn't supposed to eat before the exam and we were also hungry. We decided to find a restaurant with Guangzhou-style cuisine. We walked around until we found one that we wanted to try. We got to see a bit of the tea culture of Guangzhou in this place. Up here in Qingdao and the northern parts, when people want to build guanxi (relationships, more or less) they will invite you to lunch or dinner. It's always a meal. If you want something from someone, better take them out for something to eat. But in Guangzhou, the people there are big on meeting for a nice pot of tea and perhaps a small snack. Many tables were filled with people just enjoying tea together as the morning turned into noon.

Our table had a teapot waiting for us as well. Here, they kept a flame burning under the teapot to always keep our water hot. It was really a nice touch, I thought. We had some very delicious things to eat during this lunch. Check it out!

 Raelynn is clearly ready for food!

 Here's the tea pot. The black one is filled with water and is kept over a flame while the smaller more decorative pot contains the tea leaves. This makes each cup of tea you have taste as fresh as the first cup. Lovely!

 Raelynn likes tea.

 Ah, some delicious xiaolong bao. That's a soup dumpling and yes, it shares the first name of my husband. The best way to eat them is to put them into your spoon so that when you bite into it, the soup portion doesn't spill all over the place. Also, you'd be wise to wait a few minutes before trying them. The insides tend to be scalding hot!

 This is a Guangzhou-style soup. I'm usually not a fan of this kind of soup, which is a sort of rice porridge, but this one was really nice.

 Jeremy ordered this chicken dish. I like to call it "Nice Try, Honey" because clearly, you can see that it's chicken feet. I just can't get into those. I have tried. I gag. I can't do it. He tried to give me a piece and got the "hell no" face from me. To be nice, I did eat some of the peanuts that were cooked with the dish but blech. No chicken feet for me, please!

Some of the most fabulous egg tarts I've ever had. These were just oh so good.

These buns had a honey glaze on the outside and a savory beef stuffing inside. We were really surprised by them.

We also had a noodle dish and some pork with vegetables but I somehow forgot to photograph them. Oh well. Not like you guys come read my blog for the amazing photos. If you do,you must be even worse a photographer than me!

The next day we spent walking around Beijing Road, a famous shopping area. Raelynn was in a bratty mood but we at least got her to try on a qipao. She finally started behaving and we treated her to ice cream. She was an angel after that too, thankfully.

On Wednesday the 21st, we went to the Chimelong Safari Park, which I wrote about separately. You can read that here.

Thursday the 22nd was the day of Jeremy's visa interview. Another insanely early morning, we somehow dressed ourselves and 2 kids and headed off to the embassy. We were about 30 minutes early but there were already gobs of people there. When we got up to the front though, the guard turned me and the children away. We had a plan for that in case they wouldn't allow us entry with Jeremy. There was a nearby Starbucks so I took Raelynn and Seoul with me to wait there. I would have gone back to the hotel but our door was equipped with a digital keypad that sometimes worked and sometimes didn't. We figured the Starbucks would keep us all entertained while we waited for Jeremy and sure beat me having to try to get the door to unlock with one whiny toddler and a crying baby.

Of all the times I've ever felt lonely in my life, and there have been many, I never at once felt so alone sitting in that Starbucks in the bustling upscale downtown area of Guangzhou. Even with my 2 children. I stared out the window and checked my phone every few minutes. Time stood still for me while I waited anxiously for him to come meet us. I started thinking about how I met my husband and how we built this life together. I started thinking about how I never wanted to be without him. I felt tears stinging my eyes despite Raelynn's cutest attempts at keeping me distracted.

So many times, I saw someone across the street dressed in similar attire only to realize it wasn't my man. And then suddenly, there he was! He strode into the Starbucks and I felt like I couldn't breathe at all. Did we get our visa???

Before I answer that, I'd like to tell you all how much I appreciate your kind thoughts, prayers and support during this time. I thank you all for thinking of us. That is why I hope you will continue to think of us and understand that at this time, I will only tell you that we are almost finished with this process, having been preliminarily approved. However, we must submit some additional papers before we can finally close this visa process chapter and move forward. So until this is all done and behind us, I'll be holding off on saying anything more.

As we walked back to the hotel, we discussed what to do next. Our flight back to Qingdao would leave very early the next morning. If we stayed at our current location, we'd need to get up at 3am to get to the airport on time. The subway system would not be open as early as we'd need it so that left taking a taxi as our only option. And that's a huge cab fare right there. Jeremy suggested we move to a hotel that was closer to the airport. We found one that was just 3 minutes away. They had free pick-up and drop-off too which was nice. But I instantly regretted this decision the minute we rolled up to the place. It looked even worse than our neighborhood. It seriously looked like a ghost town. The few people around stared openly at us. The one store we saw was rundown and ramshackle. Our room didn't even have a toilet in the bathroom - it had a squatter! Ugh! I felt like we were camping. Even more so when I discovered some mosquitoes in our room. But the room was tidy at least. And it was just for one night.

We went to get some lunch and now I felt totally depressed. We were in the boonies. We should be celebrating that we are almost done with this trying process, yet here we were, walking to the only nearby restaurant. The woman who ran it was incredibly nice though. She had Budweiser for beer, which was totally random, and she quickly had her mom begin cooking. My husband said that they grew their own food and it was natural and chemical-free. I regret not taking photos of the food. It looked like slop on a plate, the way MIL serves most things. Only MIL's cooking was much better. Raelynn liked the chicken we ordered but they'd hacked it up into such tiny pieces with bits of bone in them that I couldn't find a piece that had meat on it. I gave up. We also had fish, but the fish had so many bones that I felt like I was spitting everything out. The only thing I could eat was some sauteed watercress, which was fairly tasty. We were enjoying it until we found a long hair in it. Then our appetites ceased.

Seoul's happy wherever but I was a bit bummed to be in a place that was more country than my in-laws' mountain apartment.

 It's just us in this quiet place. There are so many tables and chairs but I can't picture the place is ever filled to capacity.

Another case where beer makes things better. It was nice to have a taste of home, even if Budweiser was never high on my list back in the US. It tasted better to me now but maybe that's because I've been over here so long.

The restaurant owner had a small boy and there was some other relative there with a little girl. Raelynn was playing nicely with them for a little while as we finished our beers. Then back to the hotel we went, stopping at the dumpy store first. The store was missing 2 walls and inside, a game of cards was being played by chain-smoking old men. They were friendly though, yelling, "Hello!" at us. The store owner put down his hand and came behind the smoke-stained counter to assist us. We bought some very stale bags of chips, a bag of spicy peanuts that were rather good actually and some instant noodles for our journey back to Qingdao. Airports in China tend to overcharge for things in the most excessive of ways. For example, last time we went to leave Guangzhou, our flight was delayed for hours. We needed to eat and our only option was a noodle place that charged 60 rmb for a bowl of noodles. Yes, really. We split a bowl between the 3 of us. For 60 rmb, we should be able to get several dishes of food, not one bowl of noodles. But to their credit, it was a very tasty bowl of noodles.

I had hoped our hotel would have better food than the country restaurant, but when we went to get something to eat, we were told they had to order something for us and they would pick it up. Or they could take us to the airport and we could eat there. They handed us a menu of items all in Chinese. I found it amusing that a sign pointed to a room past the counter touting a Western restaurant when no such thing existed. Jeremy told me what our options were on the menu. We chose a few dishes and then went to our room to wait for them. At least it was tastier than the country cooking we had endured for lunch.

Jeremy held my hands and kissed me. He said we would celebrate our preliminary approval at our favorite restaurant at the Shangri-La once we returned. He truly felt awful that our last bit of time in Guangzhou would be spent in this boring hotel surrounded by dusty buildings and people.

But it was a smart move in the end. The lines at the airport were very long. We checked in and then waited in massive security check lines. When we went through security, the woman behind the counter asked Jeremy to step back a bit. We explained we were a family of 4 and she said that she would check us in 2 at a time. Some man behind Jeremy thought he was just pushing his way up so he began to push my husband. We told him we were together and to chill out. Then a bunch of people behind this man tried to push and I could not even believe how many security people burst out of nowhere. They pushed all those people back. They were shouting that they were late for their planes but if they'd simply arrived early as we did, they wouldn't be having this problem. I found it hard to have sympathy for them after the way they behaved. Airlines worldwide have been telling their passengers to arrive at least 2 hours prior to departure.

It was a long walk to our gate. We each took a turn using the bathroom and as I came out, our flight announced it was boarding. This time, we had the first row of our class so we had more legroom. And this time, I got a window.

 And you know something else? China is just beautiful from above...

That must be what heaven looks like...or maybe it's this place - Shangri-La!

Breaking All The Rules

As Christmas quickly approaches, Jeremy and I took the kids and headed to the mall this weekend. In America, I'd just say fuck it and order everything online because there is no way in hell I will set foot in a mall there after Thanksgiving all the way through around January 10th. But here, it's quite different at this time of year. Sure, there's Christmas crap everywhere. And Christmas music, much to my joy (and before you think I'm insane for that, please come join me for Chinese New Year and you will understand what annoying music being piped through a sound system truly is). But Christmas shoppers? Not really.

On a Sunday at around lunch time, the Marina City mall, which is usually busy even when it is not the holiday season, was very placid. I was thrilled. I'd wanted to go there because there's an H&M. I had no idea what to get Jeremy for Christmas except this shirt I'd seen him looking at the last time we were there a few weeks ago.

Can I just tell you how much I love H&M? It's true. I can always find something I like in there. Always. This time, as soon as we walked in, a sweater called to me. It did. It was so me, it wasn't even funny. I rush up to it and adore it some more. It's black and has a fluffy pink heart in the center. Oh I have to have it. HAVE TO. It's 149 rmb which isn't too bad. And they have it in my size. Oh please fit me. Please look nice on me. You have to! Jeremy loves it. He wants me to try it on. On the way to the fitting room, I find another gem. A Tiffany-blue sweatshirt with a horse silhouette on it. It's so soft and comfy. I dash off with one of those too. I hand the baby to Jeremy and try on clothes faster than Superman. Lucky for me, both items look awesome so I've just gained 2 very fab Christmas gifts. Sure, there's no surprise but at least my husband knows they fit and they are liked.

Now for him. We head to the men's section. There's a huge sale going on but the shirt he liked is not where it was before. I finally find it and discover it's 249 rmb. Jeremy doesn't want me to spend that kind of money on him for a shirt. But it's Christmas, I'd protested. I want him to have something he really likes. So he says he'll look at the sale items instead. And for about 300 rmb, we found him 2 dashing sweaters.

We were high on a shopping buzz. And to top it off, Raelynn had been such a good girl. We decided to buy her an ice cream from McDonald's to reward her. After that, as we were walking around, we saw some weird displays. I thought they were dinosaurs and wanted a closer look.

 Well, it's not a dinosaur but it is some sort of life-size creature from some movie. Which movie, I've no clue but there's some poster to the left that seems to be advertising it. Unfortunately, it's in Chinese. And my Chinese just happens to suck.

But you know what? Despite my sub-par Chinese skills, I will tell you this: I understand the sign posted with the creature there. That coupled with the roping tells me that you do not want me to get close to this display or touch it. So I don't. But the Chinese people around us? Oh, China...

 This little girl's mom told her to get inside with the creature. Great parenting. Let's ignore the sign that's posted which, Jeremy says, essentially translates to "do not touch or climb." Why is it that I suck at Chinese but yet I totally understand and obey the sign that I can't really read? Oh, and the man with the baby in the first picture? Just before Jeremy snapped that photo, he was putting his baby on top of the creature. We just didn't snap a photo quickly enough.

Yes, go ahead. Touch the display even though it says not to. Get inside the roping even though it is obvious you are not wanted within its' confines. Brilliant.

The Exchange Has Been Made!

Last week, my in-laws came over for dinner. And when they did, MIL presented us with a urine-colored coat for Raelynn. Despite its' hideousness, I had to applaud MIL for leaving the tags on so we could exchange it for something else.

Which is EXACTLY what we did yesterday.

We went on a shopping trip of epic proportions. It made me wish I didn't have an ever-expanding pregnant belly or I would have wanted in on that action too. Instead, I lived vicariously through my precious Raelynn as we went back-to-school shopping. I'll show you the replacement coat shortly. But first my friends, please check out these amazing clothes we found in the women's and babies store out in Taidong...

We found all of these items at one shop inside this big store. The shopkeeper was totally awesome. We were initially drawn in because in the front of the store, there was a bin with shirts and bottoms and she'd marked it as everything in the bin was 15 yuan. That's INSANELY cheap. The blue shirt here was not in the bin though but that's okay...she gave us an amazing discount on that too. Look how freaking cute this all is!

 When Raelynn saw this Dora shirt, she went bonkers and wouldn't let go. It was 15 yuan plus it came with these adorable shorts. Yes way!

 Seeing how fond our daughter was of Dora, the sales woman handed us this other adorable set.

I picked this shirt for Raelynn because I wished I could fit into it. And I thought it was darling. She agreed it was pretty cool too. Good girl!

This skirt came from the 15 yuan bin. But the shirt? It was originally 169 yuan at Annil, which is where the ugly coat came from. We found a better coat to exchange that barfy one with and because the coat we picked out was cheaper, we could pick out a couple other things. So we said hello to this precious little shirt. Keep scrolling down to see the new coat though...

Next, another 15 yuan skirt. I should also mention that Jeremy picked out all the skirts you've seen in the post for his daughter. That might make you go "awwwww" as he did quite well picking these out. But you should have seen some of the crap he held up at the stores before we found these things. "How about this?" he'd ask in all seriousness about a very vomitous-looking obviously male-fashioned shirt. Oh well. At least he's learning.

This is another Annil shirt we got when we exchanged the coat. Wait until you see the coat we got too! Keep scrolling!

We also bought this Minnie Mouse t-shirt which Raelynn demanded to wear today. She refused to pose for a good photo though. Already a diva. Oh, and check out the bow in her hair. We bought her a bunch of new hair accessories including this one.

Check out Raelynn's new kicks! She picked these out herself. She loved them so much she wanted to wear them out of the store. The little bunny on the side will definitely match the one on her new exchanged coat too! Drum roll please!

Ta da! Here is the coat we exchanged the other one for. Why couldn't MIL have picked this one in the first place? They had some other ugly coats but there were quite a few that were cute like this. Annil is a Chinese brand but I was actually surprised by the quality and style of it. You usually find the kinds of things I've blogged about before that MIL will come trotting over with as if she's some style queen. How she came to find this little place inside the upscale mall in Taidong, I will never know. What was she doing there in the first place? When you walk into the bottom level of this mall, it is filled with make-up and beauty kiosks from all the high-end brands. L'Occitane. Lancome. Misha. If you can think of a brand, it's in there. Everything is. The ascending layers of the mall are filled with expensive clothes. It blows my mind that she would even enter a place like this, let alone BUY something from there.

Here is a close-up of the Annil jacket, with just one lone rabbit from the company's trademark. This is SO much better than the coat MIL picked out. I want it in my size, dammit! Maybe sans rabbit though.

The woman at the Annil counter was so kind and helpful too. I was absolutely shocked. Normally, you get shitty service everywhere you go in China. It was so nice to have someone who actually cared about helping us exchange the item for something more suitable. I almost felt like I was back in Seoul shopping with all the lovely sales girls there, ready to help with anything. Almost.

Now that all this shopping is done, Raelynn is ready for school, and pretty much anything with a wardrobe like that. Can this new baby PLEASE be a girl so we can use these awesome clothes again? I sure hope so. We hope we can find that out soon so stay tuned because as soon as I know, I'll be announcing it to the world.

Retail Therapy

It's amazing how refreshed you feel after going shopping, isn't it? I have always loved shopping. ALWAYS. It's one of my absolute favorite things to do. Even in tight financial times, to just buy myself a little tube of lip gloss or a shirt from the sale rack would do wonders for my well-being. Add to that the company of one of my gal pals (or even my fashionably awesome gay friend), some lunch and some wine, and it was a recipe for total rejuvenation.

When I lived in Seoul, I must confess that I went shopping almost daily. It's true. There are shops everywhere. Underground in the subway stations and all along the streets. So many great finds for so incredibly cheap. Clothes. Shoes. Purses. Make-up. It was like I'd died and gone to shopping mall heaven. Then, I got pregnant and my last shopping trips before we moved from Seoul consisted of buying maternity wear.

And now we're in China. The street markets aren't as awesome (or clean) as the ones I'd come to love in Seoul. But there are malls here of course. That's not the problem. It's trying to navigate a mall with a rambunctious toddler. I don't know how anyone does it alone. It's so stressful that I have put off shopping for ages just because I cannot deal with the pretty and shiny things AND mind what my child is doing. How do other moms do this, I wonder to myself as I struggle to pick Raelynn up off the floor she has somehow become so attached to while everyone stares at me and everyone in a 12-mile radius becomes deafened by her shrieking.

No matter how crazy she can be, she is my kid and I love her to pieces. I love spending time with her and my heart hurts when I am apart from her. But every mommy needs a break sometimes. And that includes THIS mommy!

I had made plans with a gal pal of mine who's still here for the summer unlike most of the other expats who have all gone off on trips to home. It was just going to be us girls, having some lunch and drinks. I can't even begin to tell you how much I was looking forward to this outing. I NEEDED IT. My husband is starting to understand this aspect of my culture - that sure, married couples need to hang with other married couples BUT women will ALWAYS need their girlfriends. Here, I have found it extremely difficult to make friends. Even in Seoul, it was so much easier to make friends. I actually had found 3 wonderful girlfriends here, but 2 of them moved to other parts of China and the other one moved back to her home of Australia.

Anyway, I lined up my in-laws to come over and watch Raelynn during the day, which would kill 2 birds with one stone. I'd have someone to watch my child (albeit someone with a pea-brain) and my in-laws would get to spend time with Raelynn which they of course enjoy doing. I even confirmed with this friend yesterday if we were still on and she told me that yes, we were still having our girls' day. So imagine my surprise when I get a text (not a call mind you, but a text) last night asking me to call her because she didn't want to wake the baby. She'd sent it around 9pm, when we were out to dinner with my husband's old soccer coach who has been visiting all this week, but I was too busy trying not to gag on huo guo, which means hot pot. I HATE HOT POT. I totally do. You have a big pot of boiling water on your table and you drop in raw meats and veggies and then pull them out after they have been boiled. Then, you are supposed to drag them into this slimy peanut sauce. I HATE IT. They gave me some soy sauce to dip my food in which helped a bit but it still was not what I wanted. All through that meal, I kept thinking that the next day, my friend and I would eat something normal. Something Americans find delicious. Not soggy meat in slimy sauce.

Once we were home and Raelynn was asleep about an hour later, that's when I saw her message. My heart sank. I knew right then she was going to bail. It was so epic too. When I replied to her text, she responded that because she's changing schools this semester, she's having a visa crisis and might get deported. I stood there, staring at the phone in disbelief. They have made some changes to the visa requirements recently, but I've never heard of a school not being able to extend a visa for a teacher while things get taken care of. I felt sorry for her but then, a bit angry. Because here she is contacting me at 9pm about this. Surely, she didn't just find this mess out after her dinner, no? Of course not. And that's when I just felt like giving up on making friends here completely. By the way, for my guy friends here - you all are great. Really. You and your wives and your sweet kids are all wonderful friends, but I'm complaining about a lack of girlfriends here.

All this made me so sad for home. So much sadder than usual. So all my girls back home (and my girls in Korea too) - you all know who you are too - thank you for being my friends even while I am so far away. I need you more than ever now. I look forward to a day where we can go shopping with reckless abandonment (or somewhat reckless anyway). A day where we can drink so much wine that we need one of our husbands to come get us. A day where we can eat the most fattening sampling of desserts ever and not once think about all those horrid calories flocking to our asses and thighs. Yes, girls. When I come back home, it's on.

Jeremy of course hates to see his wife sad. And of course he owed me for the foot incident, not to mention the whole watch-losing-drunken-situation. So when I told him to tell his parents not to bother coming to watch Raelynn, he said no way. He'd reschedule his morning for me and take me shopping in Taidong, which is basically a giant outside mall of walking streets filled with all kinds of shops, and then we could have lunch together, just the two of us. We had been wanting to do something like this for a while and now with my so-called friend's flake-out, it seemed like the perfect opportunity. We haven't had a date without Raelynn since our anniversary last September.

Raelynn was understandably quite upset to be getting the shaft as she realized we were leaving her with Grandpa and Grandma. I felt my eyes well up with tears as she cried for me when I walked out the door. No. Must be strong. Must do something for me so I can be a good mommy for her. Off we went. It was so weird to be in the car together and not hear Raelynn counting or pointing out buses and taxis. Or screaming for crackers. Or just screaming in general.

When we got to Taidong, Jeremy asked me where I'd like to go first. One of the things I wanted was to get new shoes for Raelynn. She needed a pair of nice dressy shoes to go with this awesome fancy dress my folks had sent her. I had the good sense to trace her foot so we'd know we were buying the right size shoe. In Taidong, there is this awesome baby store but it is chaotic. Having Raelynn with us just makes it so much more stressful. Now was our chance to buy the shoes quickly, without any tantrums or fuss. But my husband wagged his finger at me. No, you first. We will buy something you want for you first, he insisted.

So we went to my favorite little make-up shop. The woman who owns it has lots of make-up imported from Korea, some knock-offs of high-end stuff, and even some stuff from the states. All of it at great prices. She's also patient as I try to speak to her in my poor Chinese. It helps that I can gesture to her about what I'm looking for. If I have more specific questions, my husband helps me ask her. After buying me some nail polish and eye make-up, we make our way to the fancy department store. Unlike the small make-up boutique, it is air-conditioned, and we kind of just bask in that coolness for a moment before moving on. We look at iPads. We look at jewelry. We look at...Skin Food.

When I first went to Korea, I remember being in a taxi and seeing a store called Skin Food and about peeing my pants laughing my ass off. All I could think of was the old Ren & Stimpy cartoons with Powdered Toast Man scraping his face off.

But of course, Skin Food has nothing to do with him. It is filled with tons of amazing skincare products. When I lived in Seoul, it was seriously all I ever used on my skin. And now, there is a kiosk in this mall, which my wonderful husband made a purchase from all in the name of keeping me happy.

Next, we wandered around toward the watches. I wanted him to have a new watch. Watches are important to Chinese people. Just like having a nice car, a nice watch gives you a good status. My husband was tempted to buy a cheap watch at a kiosk in front of the Wal-Mart, where we had wound up running in for an umbrella when a sudden downpour attempted to thwart our fun. But they looked as cheap as their prices. Inside the nice mall, I managed to find him yet another beautiful watch that was just right for him, and just right in price.

After that, we bought shoes and new markers for Raelynn. And then we had lunch at McDonald's. It was so much fun to get to hang out with my husband like that again, sharing our new umbrella in the rain and laughing away the day. He might not be one of the girls, but he sure is one hell of a guy. Thanks for a great day, honey! I love you!

Found: Lost Dog

I find it crazy that, living in a country like China where they make millions of things for export, I cannot find a bag of 5 - 10 pairs of white athletic socks for sale ANYWHERE. They make the socks here. Why don't they sell a big bag of them then? Is it because people here tend to wear the same thing for several days (see, or rather smell, exhibit A, my in-laws)?

I say this because my husband found 3 pairs of socks for me today while we were in Taidong. We'd popped over there quickly after taking Raelynn for one of her vaccinations. Taidong tends to be a total zoo on the weekends but early on a weekday, it's a breeze. Our main purpose was to find markers that were safe for Raelynn to use. Secondary to that, my socks, since all of mine had begun to develop large holes in them, rendering them completely useless. And as a bonus, we found the cutest pair of jeans for Raelynn too.

We begin to hurry home because someone is crying for "crackoo," Raelynn's way of saying "crackers." Jeremy parks the car and I run around the other side to unbuckle Raelynn from her car seat. And that's when I see it.

Looking like a mangy lost dog that hadn't been hosed down in months, MIL comes seemingly out of nowhere. Oh. GOD! Why is she skulking around down our street? Is she just waiting for us? She wants to see Raelynn and I try to force a smile to override the visible scowl I know I'm making. I just can't help it. She bugs me, lurking around our neighborhood. It's just too convenient. But thankfully, my husband tells her I have to take the baby upstairs now because she's really hungry. The downside: we have to have dinner with the old mutt tomorrow. At their house of bad smells and disgusting food. We had to go there the other night so they could show off how they finally got a real toilet. That night, MIL had made the most bland food ever. The only things I found edible were some toasted cashews and a tiny plate of fried shrimp. The other items were: a green cabbage dish cooked in way too much oil with some bay shrimp; a cabbage dish that had been cooked so long it was colorless, swimming in a sea of very unappetizing brown sauce; fried small fish and plain overcooked noodles.

Jeremy kept force-feeding me chunks of the fried fish, which was absolutely atrocious. Why they think this fish - the kind I'd use for bait when I'd go fishing - is so delicious, I will never know. It is just as bland as MIL's personality. I like fish but not this kind. The way she cooks it makes it so dull and tasteless. Blah. Before we left, MIL, noticing that I'd eaten very little, decided to fry up some chicken wings, which she actually makes quite well. Why she didn't just do that from the beginning I'll never know. Does she forget every single time that I despise the small fried fish she serves? That I grimace when I see her overcooked vegetables drowning in unpalatable sauces? Just like MIL herself, her cooking is totally for the dogs.