Friday, October 21, 2011

More Misinterpreted Menus

This evening, my husband and I went out to dinner, along with our very adorable but noisy third wheel, Raelynn. Lane is a wonderful husband. He's always so considerate about the things I miss from back home. When we were in Seoul, I'd gotten him to fall in love with various cuisines, one of them being Mexican. But once we moved here, we found that the array of available cuisine was seriously lacking. One thing that is sadly missing from Qingdao is a Mexican restaurant. You CAN find the things you need to make Mexican-style dishes at some of the stores, but you have to hunt around for the ingredients.

Anyway, Lane told me the other day that he found a Mexican restaurant here in Qingdao. I couldn't believe it. It seemed too good to be true. And of course, it was. What my husband found though was a lovely little restaurant with some very good food, even if it wasn't Mexican. This is the closest we will get to Mexican cuisine here, with a few dishes on the menu like "Mexican Fried Shrimp" or "Mexican Meatloaf." Which I had and it was not Mexican by any stretch but it was very tasty.

Before we ordered, we had a great laugh at the menu. Yes, more poorly translated items, served up hot and fresh for you! And here they are:
First up, "Comely Girl Iced Blend." Apparently, this coffee blend is only for pretty girls. Or perhaps it makes you into one. There's a lot of ugly people here. Maybe they should be drinking this one up then.

Where to start here? Oh let's work our way down the list, shall we? I love this "Matcha Smilar to Ice Piece" item. I mean it is all sorts of WTF now isn't it? "Sweat Honeydew"cracks me up too because my husband also confuses "sweet" and "sweat" when he's writing. He once texted me that he couldn't wait to give me a sweaty kiss and I about split my sides laughing while on the subway in Seoul.

What had originally caught my attention on this page though was the "Aegean Sea Taste Ice Cream." I can't even begin to imagine what that flavor would taste like. If I had to venture a guess, perhaps salt, shrimp (complete with their spooky shrimp heads still intact), seaweed and krill. I also looooooove that they have something called "Colorful Ice Cream." Because, you know, when I go out for ice cream, I want it to be colorful. Fuck what it tastes like!

And here we have the pièce de résistance. No, it's not the "Bacon Muffin." You all have that shit in Denny's now or something like that, right? No, no, no. This is so much better. Look below that. "Meat Floss Wuffin." Take a moment to digest that, and pardon the pun while you're at it. What in the world is meat floss? Just so you know, Lane didn't know either. The frosting on the cake though (or in this case, muffin) is "Wuffin." How fucking funny is that? Oh sometimes I do soooooo love living here! 

On that note, I'm off to spend time with Lane while Raelynn is sound asleep. Maybe we'll eat some wuffins or something.

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