Tuesday, April 12, 2011

Ancient Artifacts Discovered In My Home!

Once upon a time, people long ago didn’t have the luxury of going to the store to get food or the tools necessary to prepare that food. Museums around the world amaze us with their displays of primitive items that those who lived way back when made themselves to help make their lives easier. When you see these things, you can’t help but be impressed, as well as relieved that you and I can walk into just about any store in today’s modern world and buy the things we need.  

So, what ARE these tools in the picture above? The first razors ever developed? Why, it’s two very archaic vegetable peelers.  And this wasn’t on display at some museum. Oh no. I discovered these rusting relics in MY kitchen. Yes, my MIL has actually been using this shit to peel fruit and vegetables when she cooks in our home. These corroded fucking things! We have a real, modern vegetable peeler that is not rusting away and works beautifully. She had no idea how to use our rust-proof one. Um, the same way you use your primitive peeler? Dear Lord! It honestly looks like something my FIL might have fashioned out of metal scraps while they lived in the countryside many years ago, before China really began to develop.

Thankfully, these prehistoric pieces have now been removed from my kitchen, presumably to the nearest museum!

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